I love my mother....I love my mother....I love my mother....
I have to keep reminding myself of that.
Because, when I picked her up yesterday, she got into my car and handed me a bag.
And then she said, "I bought you this blouse last week when I went shopping with your sister."
I responded, "Oh, thank you! That was so nice!"
She retorted, "Well, I actually bought it for me. But, it's toooo big! The tag says it's a MEDIUM but it must be a LARGE because it's tooooo big for me. But, it will fit you because your ass is bigger than mine....way bigger than mine. So, it should fit you because of your BIGGER ass..."
I interrupted, "MA, ALRIGHT! I get it! Enough already about my ass!"
But, my 78-year-old madre ALWAYS has to get the last word in, so she whispered under her breath, "It's not my fault it's bigger than mine..."
And being that I am going to be just like her when I grow up, I couldn't let her get the last word in. So, I responded, "and it's not my fault that nursing homes are full of fresh little old ladies." And I gave her a big, toothy grin.
She stuck her tongue out at me.
I love my mother...I love my mother....I love my mother.....