You know that song, "You're the Inspiration" by Chicago?
Well, I was walking by a vintage clothing store in downtown Newport, RI, when I suddenly found mine (inspiration, that is):
I know what you're thinking. What a delightfully whore-ish gown!
And you would be correct! But, no worries.
I'm p-r-e-t-t-y damn sure there's no way in hell I could ever even squeeze just one of my ass cheeks into this dress.
And that's a good thing. Because, let me tell you something. If I ever was that skinny, I would show off to the world! I would forgo all clothing! I would walk around barlicky bare ass just for shits and giggles!
And I mean EVERYDAY and EVERYWHERE!
Well.... at least until I got arrested.
Be grateful for cannoli, people.