Friday, August 7, 2009

You Like Me! You Really Like Me!---Sally Fields (Accepting Her Academy Award)

Dudes, like George and Weezie Jefferson, I am SOOOO movin' on up. Seriously. Check out the blog award that I received last week:

The base reads:

M&M Police Annual Award, 2009
Awarded to Sally Costa
Most Obnoxious Blogger

And in case you know not what this award is referring to, please click HERE and then HERE.

Sweet Jesus! Most obnoxious blogger! Frig the college degree in education, people! Finally, an accomplishment that my Mama will ooze Portuguese pride over!

For this most high honor, please indulge me while I thank the following, without whom this incredulous accomplishment would not have been possible:

*First, I would like to thank God for not hitting me in the noggin with a bolt of lightening every time I am vulgar...because if this actually happened every time I am vulgar, which you all know is quite often, my damn brain would totally be crispier than a very slow roasted Peking Duck by now.

*Second, I would like to thank my husband for giving me crap to bitch about by STAYING SO THIN despite eating like a beast...and thereby aiding me in UNIFYING all women who both read my blog, and also dream of force feeding their husbands or boyfriends (or husbands AND boyfriends...I don't judge) into diabetic comas (one of these days it'll be Twinkies til you puke, guys).

*Third, I would like to thank my Mom for constantly pointing out that even though she gave birth to nine children and I've given birth to zero children, her ass is still smaller than mine and I must get that from my father's side of the family and thank God that's all I got from them because I could have inherited characteristics that are WAY worse (hint: Can I interest anyone in some Portuguese moonshine?). Thanks for fueling the fires, Mama. Love ya.

*Fourth, I would like to thank all of my faithful blog readers for not only reading my posts, but also for leaving me such encouraging comments and not telling me that I should run and seek immediate psychiatric therapy. Without you, there would be no one to listen to me talk out my ass. And that would suck.

*And finally, I would like to thank my friend, Lou (and his wife Linda) for actually making this award for me. Oh, and for giving me crap to write about by doing shit like giving me crappy gifts, encouraging me to eat and drink like a PORKER, and causing scenes everywhere we go. Without you, I would be much quieter, much more reserved, and a hell of a lot skinnier. Love you guys!

Thank you, thank you, thank you, one and all!

Have a great weekend everybody!


Anonymous said...

What an absolutely perfect award for you! Snicker. You are blessed with such delightfully wicked friends-- I loved the cannolli pic and the basket of rotten fruit. I think I have largely mastered the fine art of not drinking and mais fica reading. My laptop is grateful.

Have a great day!

Sally said...

Thanks for reading Barb! You rock!!

Rapunzel said...

Oh, Sally, I hesitate to say you deserve this award because you are far from obnoxious even though you do make me laugh so hard I spew coffee through my nose almost every morning. I love that about you!

Sally said...

Oh, Michelle! You are too kind!Thank you so much! And I want you to know that I am totally in love with that Florida lifestyle of yours and on many days, I live vicariously through you ;)

Sally said...


I meant: MICHELE!

Rapunzel said...

Sally, you are welcome to visit me here in the swamp any ol' time you want! Come on down, just bring a gallon of mosquito repellant and jug of sunscreen! ;) I'll provide the swimming pool, frozen (low-cal) cocktails and handsome pool boy.

Hanlie said...

You slay me! Really, you do! I love that award.

Deb said...

Couldn't have happened to a nicer blogtress! Maybe next time it will be a tiara.
Be well and stay vulgar.

Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit said...

Thanks for thanking us "little people" too. I feel so special.

happyfunpants said...

Cutest. Fake. Award. Ever.

Also, I don't think you're obnoxious at all.