Thursday, January 7, 2010

Even With Jesus Watching....

It's been awhile, but I've got a "mother" story.

Almost every single Saturday, I take my seventy-eight year old mother (who is the Portuguese version of Sophia Petrillo) out for lunch, to do errands, to go shopping, and to church.

I do this because (A) most of the time, I like spending time with her, (B) she doesn't drive, so I like to get her out of the house when I can, and (C) I am trying to secure my place in Heaven (Trust me, I need all the help I can get).

So, last Saturday, while we were sitting quietly in church listening to the pastor's sermon, out of NOWHERE my mother turned to me and whispered, "Hey..."

But, I didn't hear her because I was LISTENING to the priest, right? So then she whispered a little louder, "Hey, Sally..."

This time I heard her and I'm thinking, "What the heck is so important that she needs to talk to me RIGHT now?"

I figured maybe she wanted me to move out of the way because she had to go to the bathroom or something, right?

So, I leaned in a little closer to her and said, "Ma...What's the matter?"

She leaned in...reeeeaaaaallllyyyy close to my face----like what she had to say was ULTRA important and just COULD NOT WAIT----and whispered, "YOU NEED A HAIRCUT."

NICE.

In response to her out of the friggin blue (and completely inappropriate) comment, I shook my head, gave the her a VERY DISAPPROVING LOOK, and thought to myself...

Hello, Jesus? Where are those lightening bolts when you really need them?

5 comments:

Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit said...

You, my dear, are a sit-com.

Sally said...

Hmmmm...or a sh*tty reality show...

Anonymous said...

I think this lady has you beat (passing on the love from Sheesh)
http://millenniumhousewife.blogspot.com/2009/12/things-i-have-said-to-my-parents-today.html

Barb

'Drea said...

Man, you must really need a haircut if your mother did that in front of Jesus...

Rockin' Robin said...

So funny!