Thursday, January 28, 2010
So Long, Sleeze Ball!
Today, I had a whole post planned revolving around my beloved crockpot. Because, dudes? I am in love with it.
But, shortly after getting my arse out of bed, I saw the news.
And then? I read the news.
And I was all like, Praise the Lord! It's like Christmas all over again! And, I must share my joy with my internet peeps!
Right about now, you're probably thinking, "What in the friggin hell is this chick so damn excited about?"
And I AM FUGGING HAPPY TO SHARE THE NEWS! Ready?
It's finally happened!
Elizabeth Edwards has filed for legal separation from her rat-bastard, scum sucking dog of a husband---citing that she just can't take him and his lyin' cheatin' ways anymore!
Can I get a hallelujah, brothers and sisters?
OK. How did I suddenly turn into an evangelist?
Yeah. Apparently, all of this crap between him and the skanky whore who is the mother of his illegitimate child, is too much for Elizabeth to bare. She is DONE with him....You know...because she has other, more pressing things to deal with like raising two young children WHILE battling STAGE FOUR CANCER and shit.
I am so frigging happy.
Because, you know what?
I don't think it's EVER too late to take back your dignity! And even though Elizabeth is sick, and even though she has suffered through the awful humiliation associated with being married to a douche nugget like John Edwards, she has and always will have more class in her baby toe than that two dollar ho---Yeah, I'm talkin to you, Illegitimate Baby Momma---has in her whole skanky body.
Oh, yeah. And one more thing...
When all of this info about the Edwards' separation became public, John Edwards made it a point to STRESS to the media that when he had the infamous affair with Douchenaya (another name for Illegitimate Baby Mama), his wife's CANCER WAS IN REMISSION!
Yeah, cuz THAT makes sticking your DINGUS where it doesn't belong SO MUCH MORE ACCEPTABLE, a**hole!
What a freakin pig!