Friday, March 19, 2010

You Learn Something New Everyday!

Last night, at about 9:30---I was at home, sitting at my computer (upstairs), quietly typing an essay about a book that I was asked to review (more about that later). Hubby was downstairs watching reruns of his favorite show, TWO and a half MEN, and I could hear him laughing hysterically.

All of a sudden, Hubby was at the foot of the stairs yelling up at me:

Hubby: Hey, Sal?

Me: What?

Hubby: Can you do me a favor?

Me: Yeah. What?

Hubby: Can you Google "Swampass" for me?

Me: Google WHAT?

Hubby: SWAMPASS!

Me: Swampass? WHAT THE HELL??

Hubby: On TWO and a half MEN! Charlie Harper has a rash down there. Jake and Alan just asked him if the rash has anything to do with swampass. I never heard that before. Can you look it up for me?

Me: Okay. Hold on....

So, I typed swampass into Google and was directed to the Urban Dictionary, where I found this:

Swampass:
Is the condition when you sweat a lot in the ass/ball region and it releases a terrible smell. Other factors that add to the condition are not wiping properly and not showering daily.
e.g., I was standing behind Jordan and he smelled bad. I said wow! You have some bad swampass.

Me: Oh.My.Fugging.Hell!

Hubby: WHAT?

Me: That is disgusting! I'm up here trying to be all intellectual...and you're bothering me with this?

Hubby:
WHAT? What is it?

Me: It's the smell that radiates from dudes who don't wash their wieners and asses!

Hubby: Ewwww...Nasty. (LONG PAUSE) Oh, well. I guess you learn something new everyday!

Me: Oh, jeez.


That's my husband...always looking on the positive side of things.

Personally, I think that sometimes, ignorance is bliss. Seriously.

6 comments:

Debs said...

LOL. Maybe you can work it into your essay.

cmoursler said...

lol, I just found the urban dictionary the other day when I looked up the word "taint'.
I won't explain what the word means here....but trust me...ignorance is bliss.

TheUnlikelyTriathlete said...

Not restricted to men... on my field hockey team in highschool girls would talk about it all the time...and I have bought a product called "Anti Monkey-Butt Powder" to assist with it on bike rides. Ewwwwww.

Robin said...

LMFAO!!!!!!!! Thanks for the chuckle before bed.

Katy said...

ahh hahahahaha. I saw your post on jack shit and decided to check your real blog out. You don't dissapoint! So funny. Can we be best friends? Just sayin'?

Sally said...

Katy,

You're in! Trust me. I can use all the friends I can get!

Thanks for reading ;)

XOXO,
Sally