Wednesday, September 1, 2010

I'd Rather Have Visions Of Sugar Plums Dancing In My Head

This morning's telephone conversation between me and Lou (I called him)...

Lou: Good morning, Honey!

Me: Good morning, Louie.

Lou: How are you today?

Me: I'm fine. Listen! I'm calling to tell you that I keep getting emails from your email address that link to some pharmacy in Canada that sells erectile dysfunction drugs. WTF is up with that?

Lou: You're not the first person to tell me that! I think someone hacked into my email account. My son-in-law told me to change my email password, so I did. Apparently, that didn't help!

Me: Nope. It definitely didn't help. Matter of fact, the last email I got from you posted this morning at 12:50AM! THAT'S WHEN I KNEW it wasn't really you because you were sleeping!

Lou: *PAUSE* Hmmm...How do you know it wasn't really me? I mean...I COULD HAVE been up at that hour...snapping my carrot, thinking of you, and sending you Viagra emails.

Me: If that's the case, then we are OBVIOUSLY spending way too much freakin time together! I'm cutting you loose! Have a nice life, PIG!

Lou: BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Me: I'm hanging up now, you NASTY BASTARD. You AND YOUR CARROT have a nice day.

*CLICK*

Good Lord. I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.

2 comments:

Watching and Weighting said...

he did not say 'snapping my carrott' to you! Did he?

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!!!

Sally said...

Lizzie,

YES.HE.DID. Blech....