Monday, October 18, 2010

What The Shuck?

A Love Letter To My Husband...

Dear Paul,

You know the other night when you asked me if I wanted a snack and I asked you what you had in mind and you told me that it was a surprise but that it was something that you had to shuck and I was so flippin excited because I LOVE raw oysters and little neck clams and I assumed that THAT was what you were preparing for me in the kitchen because YOU KNOW how much I love SHELLFISH, but you also know that I can't shuck anything without losing my finger skin and/or major amounts of blood?

Yeah, well, for the record?

Where I come from? Pulling the wrapping off of mini Reese's Peanut Butter cups and presenting them to me on a friggin paper plate DOES NOT constitute SHUCKING.

Also? How would you like it if I asked you, "Do you feel like getting lucky tonight?" And then, when you said yes, I CRACKED YOU IN THE HEAD with a metal horseshoe and stuffed a rabbit's foot down your throat?

Yeah. It's called misleading your spouse. And it's kind of like what you did to me...minus the concussion.

God...You're soooo lucky to have a wife who's always teaching you important life lessons. I hope you realize that.

Me Love You Long Time,
Your Awesome Wife, Sally


Anonymous said...

Cute :)

Rob Dyess said...

That is what my wife does to me--- that is--- teaches life lessons that I didn't know I needed.


Anonymous said...

I just found your blog and you are hysterically funny - thank you! I needed something awesome to read at work!