Monday, February 7, 2011

Losing Weight & Blowing Chunks

Hello, Amigos!

So sorry that I have been MIA for over a week! But, I'm baaaaack!

So, I'd like to start this week by giving you an update on the ten week challenge that I'm doing with my trainer, Amy Jones.

It's week six. And it's getting more challenging, people. I'm not even shitting you.

Amy continues to push me (and everybody else in the class) to the brink of my limits AND just when I think that I'd better call my cardiologist and have her meet me at the E.R.---it's over. WHEW. That was close.

And last week, during one of my training sessions? I had an honest to goodness total Biggest Loser moment.

You ever see trainer--Jillian Michaels, on the Biggest Loser--push someone so hard that they barf all over their treadmill?

Yeah well, they've got nothing on me, peeps.

Because last week? About a half hour into one of my sessions, I felt super nauseous. And while lifting weights, I briefly glanced at the wall clock to decide if I could hold down my afternoon snack (almonds and water) until I got home.

AND the funniest thing was AMY CAUGHT ME LOOKING AT THE CLOCK and she smiled as if to say, "You can look at that clock all you want, SISTER. THIS PARTY AIN'T OVER TIL I SAY IT IS!"

So, I felt like I had to clarify my behavior. I said, "I'm trying to decide if I can hold down my puke until I go home."

Completely unfazed, she responded, "If you have to throw up, go ahead. But, leave the door open so I can hear you."

Lovely.

Apparently, she's met a few drama queens who will FAKE BARF to get a little exercise break.

At that point, my stomach made the decision for me. I calmly put my weights down, walked over to the bathroom, leaned the door in a little until it was only open about six inches.

AND THEN?

I blew chunks in the sink. TWICE.

Who knew I could churn my own almond butter? Hehehe...

When I was done, I cleaned the sink, splashed cold water on my face, and went right back to the weights because I am not a wuss. I AM WOMAN. HEAR ME ROAR!

A couple of days later, people were still asking me if I was okay. And I was all like, "Of course I'm okay! Why wouldn't I be?" And they'd be all like, "Well, BECAUSE YOU PUKED!"

Dudes! Puh-leeze. I got my ass kicked. And I barfed. But you know what? I wasn't embarrassed at all...because I know that I must be doing something right.

And today? My trainer proved my theory by posting this as one of her Facebook statuses:

"If you haven't felt the nausea, you haven't tasted your boundaries!"---Amy Jones

Hmmmm....I guess BARFING, while working out, is the equivalent of earning a special badge of honor, y'all.

I feel like a Girl Scout (minus those fuggin cookies, of course).

4 comments:

Amy Jones said...

ok ok just so people don't take this the wrong way and report me to the trainer police...Yes, I have seen many drama queens in my day however, hearing the puke let's me know you're alive and not passed out on the bathroom floor. I don't hope for puking BUT when trainees finally lower their boundaries and learn to trust me, they tend to test their own limits (similar to a child testing limits knowing innately that their parent will protect them) Unfortunately, sometimes a trainee will disregard the TOO MUCH feeling one rep too many and hence the puking! It's not horrific or detrimental, it's simply a reminder that they didn't eat early enough before a workout. Losing weight and becoming stronger is about testing unchartered waters...it's an amazing journey when one allows themselves to explore without hesitation...You're getting it Sal...and I'm sorry to inform you that you'll just have to change your name because you are NO SALLY!

Sally said...

Whatever it takes to get me into that coconut bra, SISTA!

:)

Amanda said...

Now if only we had an Amy Jones down here in Florida! And why yes, yes I'm making excuses...

Anonymous said...

OMG, that is too funny! The post was hysterical. I guess I can relate all too well, because the same thing happened to me in step aerobics! Keep on fighting the good fight!

Thanks for the laugh. Be well, Be happy.

Joni