Last night, Hubby requested that we go to one of his favorite Italian restaurants for dinner.
Even though I've been trying to curb the whole eating out thing lately (because I want to lose weight / avoid food temptations /stop my ass cheeks from dragging on the ground), I agreed to go. I figured it would be a good test for me because I seriously need to learn how to make better food choices when I'm in social situations.
Before we left, I purposefully explained to the Husband that even though we were going out to enjoy a nice dinner, I was not going to sabotage my weight loss efforts and all of the damn exercise that I sweat my funbags off doing this week. I was not going to indulge in any appetizers, dessert, or alcoholic beverages and I would appreciate it if he would support me in my efforts.
"That's fine. Whatever you want...no problem at all." he said.
Cool. This will be a lovely way to end our weekend, I thought.
So, we got to the restaurant and sat at a lovely corner table for two. Immediately, the waitress came over and we ordered
drinks--a glass of red wine for Hubs and some carbonated water with lime for me. THEN, the waitress brought over a loaf of bread (A WHOLE FUGGIN LOAF) with some dipping oil, which I pushed away and the Husband proceeded to devour.
Whatever, dude. I can handle this.
In conjunction with the olive oil / bread blotter combo, the Husband also ate a Caesar salad. Then, he had two pan seared/breaded/lubed up in God knows what chicken breasts, a pile of pasta drenched in pesto sauce, another glass of red wine, followed by a GLASS OF MILK, and a white chocolate-hazelnut tartufo (white chocolate gelato, rolled in nuts, covered in whipped cream, dusted with cocoa powder).
While I watched him eat, I drank water, more water, and even more water. Then, I ate some spinach pasta (about a cup and a half) with four shrimp in a spicy tomato sauce. No cheese. No bread. No wine. No gelato. No bullshit.
I think I handled myself pretty well and I was proud of the fact that I didn't misstep and sabotage myself.
However, truth be told?
I kinda wanted to give my husband rabbit punches to the back of the head because he was lounging and savoring and taking FOREVER and a freakin day to eat all of that crap.
When we FINALLY got home, Hubs was tired (No shit! He was in a carb coma!) He took a shower and went to bed.
I stayed up and read for awhile. Then, I went to bed at 10:30...and I slept like a baby.
This morning, I awakened to the Husband...yelling profanities from the bathroom.
Hubs: What the f*&%?! Holy f%$#^&* shit!
Me: What's the matter?
Hubs: I'll tell you what's the matter! I'm THREE pounds heavier today than I was yesterday!
Me: (hiding under the blankets) Hehehehehehe....Um..And you're surprised, WHY?
Hubs: Sal? Seriously? Three pounds in ONE day?! That's horrible! AND I slept like TOTAL SHIT last night. I was up at TWO O'CLOCK in the morning with the worst heartburn ever!
Me: (hiding under the blankets) Hehehehehehe....Wow! *snicker, snicker* That's terrible! I slept reaaaaallyyyy great! Like a baby! I feel refreshed! Ready to take on the world!
Hubs: *blank stare* You're going to write about this on your blog, aren't you?