Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Slow & Steady Wins The Race...But, Legal Action Could Help

Yesterday, a man who I see five days a week, asked me, "Are you losing weight?" 

Cool, I thought.  All of my hard work is finally starting to show.

Proudly I replied, "Well, YES!  I'm actually working really hard at it."

Expecting a pat on the back or at least a somewhat positive response, he said, "Well.  You'd better not lose too much.  Men like women with a little meat on their bones."


If after all of this time, he has failed to notice how meaty my butt is? 

He should apply to the state for free medical benefits cuz clearly, he is severely visually impaired (or he could just be a crackhead). 


BLOG ADDENDUM:  I have a huge family.  Together, we are always celebrating something (with food, of course).  Despite all of the "family shindigs" that I've been attending, including TWO this past week, Operation Ass Shrinkage is still right on target.  This was the result of today's morning weigh-in:

Of course, I am extremely happy about my weight loss.  However,  I can probably get to my goal much faster if I hang this sign on my house:

This summer, I plan on wearing a bathing suit on a public beach.  I'm not opposed to using restraining orders against ALL of my relatives to get there. 


Kyle Gershman said...

Usually the guy who says they like a little meat on the bones has too much on theirs.

Congrats on your loss!

starfish264 said...

God damnit - I love you! :o) I might have to take out a similar order on my friends. Or sew my mouth shut. I'm not sure which yet.

Sally said...

I love you too, man ;)

The Path Traveled said...

Hes a jurk!
I love that sign! I need to get one for my yard.

Three Hundred Sixty Five said...

If you want some more dieting tips (oh, and who doesn't????), you might want to take a look at my post for this week. Oh, and I hate those kind of comments. I had someone tell me (a man of course) "If you loose too much weight, you won't have any boobs". And it wasn't my husband.

Anonymous said...

Where do I get a copy of that SIGN???