Wednesday, February 29, 2012

"Oooh Baby I Love Your Way." Meh...Not Really.

If you read my last post, you know that my husband spent Valentine's Day morning ducking flying objects.  (Oops!  It just slipped from my hand, Officer!)

To make that up to him, I had a really great Valentine's Day planned.  After work, I took him to one of his favorite Thai restaurants for dinner.  Then, I surprised him by taking him to see Peter Frampton in concert

Now, let me be clear about something.  I know that you're probably all thinking, "Big whoop, Sally.  You got to go out to dinner and watch the concert, too!  Why is that a gift for HIM?" 

I'll tell you why, you cynics. 

Peter Frampton is old.  When his most famous album was popular, my husband was a teenager...AND I WAS SEVEN. 

So you see, sitting through OVER THREE HOURS of Peter Frampton--singing songs that I didn't know--(Oh, alright...I knew exactly three) was a tad bit torturous for me.  But, I did it for love. 

And I did it with grace (I spent the night on Facebook), style (I looked cuter than the toothless guy to our right), and class (I didn't reek of mary-ju-wanna, like the dudes to my left). 

At one point during the concert, I will confess that, according to my husband, I may have lost my shit. 

Here's what happened....

After two-and-a-half hours, I thought the show had finally ended---mainly because the band said GOOD NIGHT, took their bows, put their instruments down, and walked off the stage. But, then, my husband was all, "Stay in your seat!  They're not putting the theater lights on!  THAT MEANS IT'S ENCORE TIME!  WHOO HOO!" 

Then, the dudes came back out and played some more.

After two hours and fifty minutes, I thought the show was FINALLY over AGAIN.  You know...because the band said GOOD NIGHT, took their bows, put their instruments down, and walked off the stage.  But, then, my husband said, "Stay in your seat!  They're not putting the theater lights on!  THAT MEANS, PETER'S DOING ANOTHER ENCORE!  WHOO HOO!"

Then, the band came back out and played some more.

After THREE HOURS AND TEN MINUTES,  I thought the show was FINALLY over.  YOU KNOW....because the flippin band said GOOD NIGHT, took their gah-damn bows, put their friggin instruments down, and walked off the effin stage.

BUT THEN, my husband said, "OH MY GOD, SAL!  THIS IS SO AWESOME!  They're not putting the theater lights on!!!  That means ANOTHER ENCORE!!!!  Can you believe how amazing this is?!!!  We're soooo lucky!"

Lucky, my assI had had enough.

I was tired.  I had to get up early the next day.  It was almost midnight.  And I needed to use to the toilet.

And that's when I allegedly flipped out (The urine I was holding in, for fear of getting crabs from a public restroom, backed up into my guts--causing me to blackout) and yelled, "OH, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, ENOUGH ALREADY!   GET YOUR ASS ON THE F*CKING BUS, PETER FRAMPTON!" 


That night? 

My husband said we were lucky. 

In retrospect, I guess I have to agree.

He was lucky that Peter Frampton put on a show that enthralled him.

And I? 

I was lucky that the hippies around me were too loaded to kick my ass.


Tuesday, February 14, 2012

All You Need Is Love...And Really Good Aim

Happy Valentine's Day, Peeps!

Today, I would like to profess my love for my husband. 

Me & PC

Here goes...

Dear PC,

You da man!  Also?  I'm sorry that I chucked a two pound weight at your head this morning.....even if you were asking for it.



Wednesday, February 8, 2012

And That's What Happens When You Let "Just Anybody" Have A Facebook Account

Normally, I'm not a crazed sports fan. 

However, when one of my home teams is in a championship game, I like to get in on all of the drama.  Being from Rhode Island, I was hoping that the New England Patriots would pull off a Super Bowl win.  Alas?  It just wasn't in the cards because basically, the New York Giants just played a better game.  Whoopty-fugging-do for them (my lame attempt at being a good sport)!

In related news, Gisele Bundchen, who is Tom Brady's wife, has come under fire for making a comment that kinda sorta blames some of the other New England Patriots team players for the loss on Sunday.  I'm not sure of her exact words, but after the game, as she was being heckled, she commented something like, "My husband played well and threw the ball well.  He can't throw the ball AND be there to catch it, too."  OH SUH-NAP, GISELE!

Since Sunday, there have been many posts on Facebook ripping Gisele a new one for being a sore loser. 

I'm not a fan of hers, but I did stick up for her on one post because, you know what?  At the end of the day, she was just a wife, sticking up for her husband. And as a married woman, I can totally relate to that.

Without further ado, here's me...sticking up for Gisele Bundchen (or as my nephew--Brian, calls her, Jinxele Bundchen) on Facebook yesterday.....sort of.....

Sally Araujo CostaEven though I don't think she's anything great, I would have reacted way worse than she did. They'd be all, "Hey Gisele, What happened out there? Your husband choked." And I'd be all, "Shut the f*ck up! Tom's teammates couldn't catch the damn ball! AND Eli Manning may have a ring, but he looks like a damn Muppet! Now excuse me while I go and console my HOT husband with sexual favors, YOU DOUCHEBAGS!"

And this is why women without mouth filters should never be allowed to marry public figures.